A Happy Holiday

The holiday festivities are starting to wind down and we are excited to ring in 2008.
We had an excellent Christmas. It started with the Nichols Family Christmas at Dan and Sandy's, Sunday the 23rd which was delicious and fun. I even managed to steal the Apples to Apples game (our family favorite) from Levi in the White Elephant Gift Exchange (although he licked the box several times in attempts to dissuade me!) Christmas Eve was me, Jon, Elizabeth, David, Kelsey, Levi, Ericka and Maelie. As with most 18month olds Maelie had little interest in her presents but we managed to get her to open all of them. She is a delight! We all went to the candlelight service on Christmas Eve and I have to admit my favorite part was sitting next to Kelsey as he belted out Silent Night. He has a beautiful voice and it made me cry.

I was grateful to sleep in until 8:00 am Christmas morning! Elizabeth, David, Jon, Kelsey and I opened our stockings and "Santa" gift while we ate cinnamon rolls and drank coffee. Jon was quite pleased with his new padded Carhart bibs and coat...so much so that he wore them inside all morning! We had a big breakfast of Eggs Benedict and then released David to spend the rest of the day with his family. Elizabeth and I made a trip to Safeway and it actually snowed! It think that is the first time I've seen snow in Seattle on Christmas Day. Levi spent the day with Erickas family (a story unto itself!) but returned for prime rib Christmas dinner. Kelsey and Levi finished off the day with video games, Elizabeth went back to Bellevue, and Jon and I watched Forrest Gump, one of our favorite movies. I was sad that I didn't get to see my side of the family but managed to talk to most of them on the telephone. My parents were visiting my sister, Barbara in Connecticut where her oldest daughter Alison just returned from six months in France. All she wanted for Christmas was to see her grandparents so I certainly can't argue with that!

Staci and Octavio arrived the next day where we did Christmas all over again. After dinner and gifts they taught Kelsey and I the finer point of poker. Octavio says I have potential but Kelsey is hopeless in the gambling world! Staci ended up the big winner of the night. True to form, Jon watched UFC videos while we played our games.

The next day was Kelsey's 16th birthday. We all spent the day in Seattle sight seeing in the freezing, pouring rain. (Yes, Kelsey we all love you that much!) Dinner was at Rock Bottom and Kelsey positively glowed with excitement. There is nothing he loves more than being surrounded by his siblings and I am eternally grateful for all of them.

Friday night was a fabulous dinner at Tony and Tonya's. Saturday was a day of jeeping and tubing in the snow complete with a big bonfire and roasted hot dogs. Jon left for goose hunting on Saturday while Levi and Kelsey went back for more jeeping on Sunday. Stac, Octavio and I went to church this morning and then I dropped them at the airport for their return to California. I booked a room at the Westin in downtown Seattle for New Year Eve for me, Kelsey, and Levi. Our plan is to go to Seattle Center and ring in 2008 with the big crowd. Jon came back early from hunting but he's not much of a crowd person so the jury is out on his participation. I suggested a good book and a movie at the hotel while the boys and I brave the crowds.

Wow, did I mention I actually managed to work a few days at the office between all that?

Jon enjoyed the holidays and all the time with our family. It seems he was more disappointed in his PET scan results than he initially let on. Although his attitude remains good he is really frustrated with living what he considers a "small" life. Before he was diagnosed he had read an article about "Living Large" and that's what he really wants to do...kind of difficult when you have to go to chemo every Tuesday. He wants to kill grizzly bears and backpack the world. Can't say I blame the guy but I try to encourage him to find pleasure in all of the simple things that surround us. I am grateful that he was able to go goose hunting this weekend which seemed to help alleviate some of his stress.

Since we are still a little puzzled about the PET scan results I telephoned a radiologist friend of mine and asked him to review all three scans with us. We have an appointment on Wednesday during my lunch hour to see him.

I am looking forward to 2008 as a year of continued hope and unlimited possibilities. Happy New Year everyone!

The Beat Goes On

We talked to some of our cancer buddies today and got the word that Doxol is tolerated very well with minimal side effects. Jon says he doesn't mind doing more chemo as long as he can keep working out and go goose hunting in January :) He also said yesterday that he is just happy to be alive and feeling good since everyone thought he'd be long dead by now. His attitude is truly amazing.

Tonight we are meeting Levi, Ericka and all of their friends at Red Robin for some Christmas Cheer. Tomorrow Levi, Ericka, Kelsey and all of Ericka's sisters are heading to the mountains to play in the snow. Jon and I will be working on Christmas prep...OK the truth is I will be working on Christmas prep and Jon will be working on his new rifle!

We are looking forward to having all the kids here for Christmas, albeit tag team with every one's work and extended family schedule. It should be a week long celebration since Staci and Octavio don't arrive until the 26th and Kelsey's sixteenth birthday is the 27th.

Merry Christmas to all of you blog readers and thank you for your continued prayers and support.

A Mixed Bag

We saw Dr. Chue this morning and are all a little confused about the results of the PET scan. The report today told us that one of the tumors in Jon's liver has shrunk while one has increased in size. The odd thing is that this scan lists several other tumors that were not listed in the last PET scan but were called "to numerous to count" in the first scan. What is even stranger is that the radiologist compared the size of these tumors to the previous scan where they were never mentioned at all. When I got home I pulled out all three scan results and read through them several times. The only conclusion I can come to is that there were so many of the small tumors originally that they appeared in too large of a number to quantify. Many of the small tumors were killed by the first two rounds of chemo and have left several smaller tumors that are evident in the most recent scan and now quantifiable in both number and size. The good news is that they scanned Jon's entire body and found no additional metastasis. There are two nodules in his right lung that do not "light up" in the PET scan which means they are more than likely a scar from the Gemzar (notoriously hard on the lungs) and not cancer. The pancreas still looks good and his SUV (intensity of the scan) has reduced from 8.9 to 2-3 which is considered a very good response.

I guess I would say that Jon and I are a little disappointed with the results. He looks and feels so good we were really expecting a better report. The two largest tumors in his liver are still too large for ablation so on we go with chemo. Dr. Chue feels that the remaining tumors may be the ones that are resistant to the chemo that we have been using so we are switching to Doxil for the next round. Jon will have that in combination with Taxol which he has had all along, it is the chemo that destroys the blood supply to the tumors to starve them out. He will have four weeks on with Doxil/Taxol, one week with just Taxol, then repeat the cycle for 14 weeks. He will have another PET scan in April. No more Tarceva since he doesn't tolerate it very well.

We continue to be optimistic with his prognosis. Dr. Chue is as excited as ever to make Jon his next poster child. I asked Jon tonight how he feels about all this and he responded, "I'm just basing my progress on how good I feel." I can't argue with that.

We have a break until January 15 which gives us time to enjoy the holidays with our friends and family. Jon plans on working out and getting stronger so that he can continue to "kick cancer's ass" in 2008!

Jon wants to make sure that I tell everyone the jeans were on sale :)

Jon bought three new pair of jeans today :)

NEXT WEEK'S SCHEDULE

LAST CHEMO TUESDAY, DECEMBER 18

PET SCAN WEDNESDAY, DECEMBER 19

CONSULT WITH DR. CHUE THURSDAY, DECEMBER 20, 9:30AM

Beating The Odds

I saw our primary care physician, Dr. Day, today for my yearly physical. She was the unfortunate doctor to find Jon's cancer. Naturally she asked how he was doing and I was pleased to report, "Very well, I even brought you a picture." She laughed and said "He has certainly beat the odds."

She kept the picture

Could this Be The Last???

Jon has just completed Chemo #37..hard to believe what a journey it's been. He is in acupuncture with Darren right now getting his weekly "needling" Last night he told me that he actually looks forward to his chemo sessions and I would have to agree. We get to spend the entire day together, the staff here is amazing, and everyone spoils him rotten. In all seriousness, Jon does miss interacting with the world on a regular basis and is sometimes jealous that I have a job to go to each day. I will take that as a sign he is getting better...when he feels crappy he just wants to sleep, then sometimes he feels good enough to know he's bored out of his mind, other times he feels good enough to be active and productive which is the only state the man has ever known. This experience has softened the old guy (sorry boys, but it's true) and has made him much more empathetic to others who have struggled and walked a different path. Jon and I have been extremely fortunate in our lives and the cancer experience has humbled us both.

Dr Chan (the primary care physician) paid his weekly visit and volunteered to schedule Jon's PET scan before I even had a chance to ask. I think everyone here is as excited as we are to see the results. Jon will have one more chemo next week and the PET scan shortly thereafter. Best case scenario is no more cancer (which Dr. Chan fully expects-the guy IS learning) and worst case scenario is surgery or more chemo. We will have an appointment to discuss this all with Dr. Chue sometime around Christmas. Darren (acupuncturist) came in for a visit during which he and Jon discussed Jon working as a Cancer Advocate at SCTWC. Knowing Jon, Darren quickly pointed out that it was a paid position :) I think it would be a wonderful opportunity for him to share his knowledge and strength with others on their cancer journey. Darren also informed Jon that he will continue to see him for his "after care" I just love how everyone here just assumes he will have a cure.

At this point we are entertaining the possibility of next week being our last chemotherapy appointment. I'm quite sure we could find something else enjoyable to do on my day off!

OH, GRANNY WHALEN!

Remember last year when Jon refused to buy new jeans in case he might die and not get his money's worth? Well he started that nonsense again this fall. He had a pair of jeans that were fairly worn and had a couple of holes in them. He asked me to patch them for him but I refused and told him he needed a new pair since he was going to live til 100. When we were in California for Staci and Octavio's wedding he asked his mother-in-law, Faye Whalen, if she would do the honors. Although I protested, she agreed and suggested that Levi bring them to her in Arizona during his upcoming visit. I then tried to convince Levi that he should just throw them in the trash, but being the compliant son he followed his father's orders.

To my delight, when Levi and Ericka returned they presented me with the most attractive pair of jeans I think I had ever seen. Granny Whalen said, "Oh, I'll fix Jon's jeans all right," then proceeded to sew on glitter, heart shaped pink patches. We all laughed our heads off and came up with a plan to put them in his closet with all of his other jeans so he would just pull them out on a dark morning and put them on. Jon has some days where he is pretty foggy in the head after chemo so we were pretty sure we'd get away with it. Sadly, last week Jon walked out of the closet shouting, "Faye ruined my jeans!" Although I was disappointed he didn't actually put them on, the look on his face was priceless!

Excellent job, G-dub!

A Good Bet To Lose.

Chemo Day! As you may have read on my prior blogs, Jon's white counts have been low and he has been using supplements not medications to raise them. We had been debating the pros and cons of using the Lukeine all weekend and Jon finally said he would bet me that his white count would be normal and he would be able to have chemo today. Well guess who won the bet?? His differentiated white counts were all normal as were his platelets. Only the hemoglobin and hematocrit were slightly low. He is also feeling much better since yesterday and we've come to the conclusion that it was his cold more than anything that drug him down over the weekend. I guess after everything we've been through we've become a bit paranoid any time he starts to feel bad. We have this fear that if he starts to get sick he won't get out of bed for weeks. Jon also said that as the PET scan closer he starts to get a bit nervous about the results. I would say I am more excited then nervous...we haven't had a bad scan yet (other than the first one!) I fully expect to see improvement, the only question will be how much and if he will need surgery.

We have a new doctor at SCTWC. He is a Primary Care Physician who sees Jon each visit (don't worry Dr. Chue is still in charge, we just see him and Dr. Reilly once a month). That position was formerly delegated to a Physicians Assistant until two weeks ago. Our new guy, Dr. Chan came in for his weekly visit. He is a fairly young, sincere and genuine guy. Of course you know Jon, he has to give the poor guy a bad time so he's not quite sure what to think of the whole thing. When Jon told him we were using a natural product and that he didn't take the meds to raise his white count he practically fell out of his chair. The first question he asked was how much it cost. When I told him my cost was around $12 and that it would sell for $25 or so at a health food store he was even more stunned. Next he asked how many pills were in a bottle. They guy just couldn't believe that we could obtain something that effective for the price. That led to a discussion of the pharmaceutical companies and their power in health care. We were teasing him about the elaborate lunches they bring to SCTWC and Dr. Chan said "Oh, they've really toned that down, they use to take us on exotic vacations but that's been illegal for about ten years." Wow...ever wonder what drives our healthcare system??

Dr. Chan went on to say that he really enjoyed working at SCTWC and how different it was from his former job. He was excited to tell us that he has referred other pancreatic cancer patients to Dr. Chue and they have actually lived for up to three years. As he was leaving the room Jon said, "Dr. Chan, just want to let you know, I plan on living a lot longer then three years...I'm shooting for 90 or so." Dr. Chan was a little flustered and said "Yes, of course that is our goal"

When our mind and body therapist, Robin paid us a visit later in the day we told her the story. Jon said she had a little work to do in the Hope department with our new Dr. Chan. Robin thanked Jon for what he had said to Dr. Chan and commented that the learning curve is quite steep for doctors coming in form other facilities.

So all in all a successful day. Jon continues to kick cancer's ass. I am asking that the PET scan be scheduled after next Tuesday's chemo.

Today was a pretty good day. Jon and Kelsey were up at 6:30 and out the door by 7. Both reported having a really good time and lots of snow in the mountains. Jon was impressed with Kelsey's shooting abilities and bragged about the "big guns" he was able to handle. Jon says he feels better today, he thinks his past few days are the result of the week of Tarceva and a cold. He's still refusing the lukeine and taking the supplements. I guess if his white count is still low he will just get another week off. I hate for him to miss any chemos because I am driven to have the PET scan before Christmas but you all know Jon, he's going to do it his way.

I'm posting some pictures of our granddaughter, Maelie. Last weekend was Levi and Ericka's first full weekend with her. They had us over for dinner and we all spent the entire evening just watching her. She is hilarious and full of energy, a Nichols through and through!

Looks like the big, bad Jon has finally hit the wall. He ran out of steam Thursday afternoon and has felt really tired and crappy ever since. I suppose we can't complain after 35 chemos a guy's got to get a little run down. I am trying to convince him to take the Lukiene but not luck so far...I guess I could just surprise him with a syringe in the middle of the night! Chemo is scheduled again for Tuesday but he won't get it if his white count doesn't come up.

We had a visit from our friend Martin and Valerie yesterday on their way back from Hawaii to Montana. It was great to see them and perked Jon up a bit. Kelsey and I are going to get our Christmas tree today and put up the Christmas lights. All the men are planning on going up to the mountains for some jeeping and shooting tomorrow. I hope Jon is up to it, he has a new rifle that he loves and always enjoys the opportunity to hang out with Levi and Kelsey.